The energy ladder uses the idea of raising my happiness quotient one true and positive step at a time. It is a brilliant tool to use at any point on the emotional scale.
There are 12 rungs. Starting with the bottom rung write down a statement about how you feel right now e.g. “I wish I didn’t have to see Aunt Madge today”
Now at the top of the ladder write out a statement you’d like to be saying about this instead – something your higher self, your best self (your Future Self) might say. For example: “I love doing what feels right for me.”
Now the idea is to go back to that initial statement and to write something against the next rung which brings you some relief and feels absolutely true. Be careful not to come up with platitudes or things you think you should say. No need to leap – just write what feels good and true. So your next statement might be: “I do like Aunt Madge’s Victoria sponge.” Good. Nothing to set you on edge there – nothing that would have you sliding back down the ladder – so on we go.
On the next rung write the next true yet relieving thing. Perhaps: “I only need stay for 20 minutes. I can spare that.”
Next: “I know I’ll feel better going than not going”. Good.
Next: “Last time I went she told me a fascinating story about her time in the Secret Service. If I didn’t go I’d miss out on hearing these amazing tales.”
Next: “I could always delay it till next week when things have quietened down here.”
Next: “What if I took James along with me? It might be fun to go as a two-some.”
And so on..right up to that top statement. When you get there you’ll likely feel that top statement now as a truth. Hoorah! Your energy has now been raised and you’re ready to move on. And if you’re not? Well then start a new ladder putting the original top statement back at the top and using your last statement from the previous ladder as your first rung.
Remember: nothing you say need to be a commitment or a promise. You are using this ladder to explore positive ways forward and possible happy outcomes. As you give yourself room to explore in this way you regain control of something that has felt like a burden and has therefore had you in victim mode.
With the energy ladder your happiness quotient is guaranteed to increase as long as you stick to the rules of each statement being: